changeling times

trials and tribulations of eclectic chicken

these things are sent to try us…. February 27, 2013

Filed under: cancer,home stuff — eclectic chicken @ 11:43 pm
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My memory being one of them.

I forgot to take my fifth mornings steroids and didn’t remember I’d forgotten until the early evening; at which point I rang the hospital and they suggested leaving them until the next morning…or face a very sleepless night.

So… I did as they suggested and took them this morning and am now having a mere sleepless night tonight instead.

The other thing sent to try me in my non-steroid slump was the central heating deciding to pack up again. Remember… we had a system flush and a new pump just before Christmas? The new pump siezed and so in my post chemo, feeling the cold, feeling miserable as fuck, haven’t remembered my drugs slump the house sunk back into the icy depths of winter.

I made myself go and check round the system yesterday (mostly making sure the boiler had a light on and no-one had pushed the bread bin back into the main heating switch and knocked it off) – [this has happened several times in the past]. I came to the conclusion (having burnt my fingers on it) that the pump was where the problem lay and I swore at it… hit it…. and tried unscrewing and tightening again the bit in the middle that sometimes encourages it into movement again. [all bona fide plumber skills according to our plumber who came and replaced it tonight].

So we have warmth again….and now I feel like sitting up in bed (its warm enough) I have the hunger upon me… craving…actually craving salted peanuts… tasty tasty fat and salt -salted peanuts are probably one of the top 10 foods I shouldn’t touch with a bargepole… along with barbed wire sandwiches…. broken glass…. lentils and well… you know the drill.

So I’ve perverted that desire into ritz crackers and pork scratchings…. neither of which we have in the house either. And some Jacobs crackers with butter on and a late night bacon sandwich just havn’t filled the gap.

Oh and the cheesecake desire is back…..

Tonight is ‘often’ the night I end up in hospital…. and as midnight approaches I’m starting to feel a tad blase about it… maybe I should sneak downstairs and chance a SMOOTH peanut butter bagel….

Or maybe I should wait until the morning and see if Jane will go and forage my desires at the supermarket.


s’no joke December 3, 2012

Filed under: cancer,home stuff — eclectic chicken @ 11:52 am
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Feeling perkier today… feeling like i’d like to be doing stuff..a little bit of stuff beyond the lying in bed and dozing and reading I’ve been doing the last few days.

But we still have no heating…. and thats a huge disincentive to removing myself from my cocoon in one of the ony two rooms with a still working radiator.

As the temperatures get colder at night we are going into lock down…. last night all sleeping in one room, every blanket and duvet in the house is now in use and we had an oil radiator on tick over.

How many more nights before we’re all piled into the same bed, me, Jane, the boy, the dog and the cat?

It certainly doesn’t inspireĀ me to get up and wander in the night when sleep evades me… or to shower…or sit and contemplate my navel on the toilet.
It makes a simple urge for some cheese on toast into an epic…. trying to muster not only the energy to go downstairs but also to dress appropriately beforehand in order to stand in the cold kitchen.

We suspect the heating system needs a full flush…and also that our plumber is hiding from us.

These things are sent to try us…. but if someone could ease up on the trying ‘me’ specifically gas that would be very kind…. warmth and food and sleep… three of my favourite things and all pretty much intextricabley linked and buggered at the moment.


Looking after mum October 15, 2012

Filed under: home stuff — eclectic chicken @ 11:37 am
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Probably my last post in this catch up flurry, as sooner or later I have to face the cold out of bed (broken central heating) and the colder outside (walking the dog, and going to the dentist).

I’ve had my mum here since last Wednesday (she slept in the front room where the only source of heat is)… I suspect its an occurance thats going to happen more and more often (though hopefully without the lack of heat element…).

My sister looks after my mum… luck of the draw mostly as she happens to live a matter of a few hundred yards away from her as opposed to 120 miles away. Had mum needed looking after a decade ago… she was living a few hundred yards away from me and a hundred and odd miles from my sister.

But I know my mum is hard work so I do what I can over the distance, when my sister phoned last week to say mum was in A&E with an infected foot (we suspect a dropped paving slab) I immediately offeredto have mum over here. She was in no fit state to travel so I waited for the word from my sister. Travelled over on Monday evening and brought mum back on Tuesday morning. Took her to the doctors, got her another course of antibiotics and tried to keep her off her feet.

We felt for a couple of days like a household in freefall, as I had a session on the bathroom floor vomiting and therefore no sleep that night, Jane has a cough that laid her low, the heating packed up and the next morning the boy was seriously late for school as nobody woke up in time.

I suspect things with my mum (and possibly our aged heating sytem) can only get worse and I may have to think seriously about moving to Cheshire so we are both a matter of a few hundred metres away… or whatever solution seems best at the time.

Had the heating been working I’d have kept mum here until her antibiotic course finished…not only was she not remembering to take them but didn’t seem to remember what she was taking them for. So ringing her several timesĀ  day to gently remind without nagging is my task from now until Thursday as I handed her back into my sisters care yesterday.

Our time as mums’ children is over… and like it or not we are being dragged into the adult role of caring for and making the big decisions in life.


….and breathe January 21, 2012

Filed under: home stuff — eclectic chicken @ 2:47 pm
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…but no ‘the conversation’ hasn’t happened yet.. it now feels like one of those things built up to be bigger and more important than it can ever be in reality.

But we do have central heating back on and not only a new (definitely more effective) boiler and pump [the latter really wasn’t meant to be making ‘those’ noises] we also have two new radiators where none existed before… One in the dining room which used to have some weird sort of semi comatose convector heater on the wall (no wonder we rarely eat in there in Winter) and one in the main bathroom!!!!! yay!!!! There used to just be a heated shiny towel rail thingy but it really didn’t come anywhere close to heating the actual room – which with two teenage girls was actually no bad thing as it kept them from living in there. Nowadays the boy and I use that bathroom (leaving the en suite to Jane and her objets de trans and her increasing clutter of female ecoutrements) and it’s sheer bliss having it a)warm enough to be naked in for more than 3 seconds and b)warm enough not to instantly and totally condense up the whole room at the merest sniff of hot water.

So thats the minutiae of our heating solutions which you all obviously called by to catch up on.

What else is going down in the house.

Things are back on with the cigar smoking bear… What’s that? I hadn’t told you they were off?

Sheesh, I can’t tell you everything…. a misunderstanding….some confusion… a lack of faith in my own judgement. See thats another thing all this hooha with Jane has done…a long term thing…. I’ve always prided myself on my instincts with people and in my ability to trust and to just bounce when trust gets broken. But by god …things have changed.

I’ve found it harder to trust… I’m always looking for what may be going on under the surface that I don’t see… I always suspect maybe I’m wrong… like I was with Jane. I find it so much harder to take what people do and say at face value.

No doubt it’ll take time… and time (I’m told) is something we have lots of.

So those of you who have noticed a lack of tales of hotpot and cigars can rest assured there will be more.

And I should be a bit more cheery again.



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