Another post chemo slump post…. but this one ‘hopefully’ will be the last.
Number 8 chemo was last Thursday, today was last day of steroids for this cycle.
…and now it’s a waiting game.
Life, even more than it has been for the last five months, is hanging in stasis…. worse than its been before becuase now I’ve done everything I can do. Like sitting an important exam – now all there is to do is sit back and wait for the results.
In this case actually waiting for a PET scan on the 20th May and THEN wait for the results. Which I’ll hopefully be given before seeing my consultant next on the 28th May.
Either way it feels like a rather long, excruciating wait.
I’m not sure what to do with myself.
Its not like I can bugger off on holiday and forget all about it or something as I still have the post chemo after effects to cope with.
But never mind…. and not like waiting for one thing is bad enough. The house buying is grinding along ‘nicely’ all the paperwork is with my solicitor and I guess we are still waiting for the searches to come back. Until it all goes through I’m all excited inside about buying a yellow kettle and a bed and getting all my coloured glass on new windowsills… planning a new garden,cooking in a new kitchen, settling in, cuddling up on the sofa with the boy and the dog – but I don’t want to spend the money or let the excitement out as it feels too much like tempting fate.
The whole bally thing feels like tempting fate…buying a house (or rather half a house…or even more accurately having half a house bought for me) before getting the results of my PET scan. But then… whatever the outcome I need to be in my own place, living my own life again… so I guess I’m waiting for that new life to start too.