I’ve not been writing… I’ve been grumpy…. basically I’ve been awaiting a CAT scan and then the results of said scan, to find out ‘what next’. Its proper horrid when your life is up in the air and you’ve no idea how to plan for the months or weeks ahead.
One of the results of this inability to plan is I decided to invite a few friends round for a birthday tea… there… that’ll teach you pesky medics to take away my ability to plan…. I’ll plan just to spite you. Well, to spite you and prove I’m still alive and able to eat meat paste sandwiches and cake.
So, in to see my consultant yesterday and CAT scan results were in… the tumour has shrunk from its initial 8-10 cm to 3cm… which is good. Its only now writing this I realise I have no idea what those numbers mean… is that measurement a circumference or diameter?… the diameter of a tennis ball being just under 7cm the circumference of a golf ball being about 14cm. Was it bigger than a tennis ball…. or smaller than a golf ball? I suspect the former as it used to be visible with the naked eye – though not from the moon. And now its not even findable with proddy fingers in the bath so it probably is smaller than the 5cm diameter of a golf ball.
But… the consultant is happy its respoding to the R-CHOP chemo and lets go ahead and have all 8 cycles of it.
See this is where it could have been better… I’ve been mentally aiming at the 6 of the 6 to 8 cycles… quite a large part of me really hoped this Thursdays number 6 chemo was going to be my last and would be a breeze at that, as it wouldn’t be followed up by intrathecal chemo (been there done that). But now… the point where I was dancing a jig as being over half way weeks and weeks ago…. was the dance of the deluded. Bugger! Okay half of 6 is 3 and half of 8 is only one more… as an equation involving biscuits its fairly painless even calorie wise… But chemo wise….
So, anyway, meh, whatever…. I have 3 more lots of chemo to go…woot woot. I’m tired and starting to look a tad ravaged… my finger nails are shot to fuck and I am getting pins and needles in my fingers from one of the chemo drugs (but thats fine as I can still use my mobile and do up buttons).
But on the bright side…. my long term psoriasis has totally gone… I’m off my anti depressants and a full 8 cycles ‘should’ totally obliterate the tumour. We then follow up with another PET scan to make sure theres no live stuff hanging on in… and THEN I can start living again properly… beginning of May.