When I first found out Jane had to dilate I thought it was something like a speculum that you had to jack up inside your new fanny.
What it actually is is a couple of dildos (but you have to call them dilators)… three times a day for the first 6 weeks (and then at lessening intervals until it becomes I think once a month 2 years post op) you have to lie down relax and coat the dildo in lube and insert it into your new vagina for a set amount of time. This stops the new hole closing up…. expecially as to make the new hole they had to drill through pelvic muscle and muscle as a rule tends to like to go back where it used to be.
This has to be done regardless of catheter, bruising, blood loss, and pain.
At first it appears to border on the traumatic… it gets easier quite quickly… and i guess the sooner you can find some pleasure in it the easier its going to be to have a decent relationship with your fanny at a later date.
I know women who have had an episiotomy in child birth who havn’t wanted to put anything near their bits for months later (certainly way beyond the 6 weeks recommended when you have one). But a trans woman has to gird her loins and start almost immediately…. pushing a blunt object into a new and unknown void.
Anyone who has gone through grs deserves a medal… and cake…and flowers and all round absolute kudos.
There were times when I had my babies where I wanted to stop and go home (and with the first one actually cried out for my mum)… until the moment the babies were laid in my arms i would have quite happily reabsorbed them.
But transwomen are driven…. if they get this far they really really need it.
After all Janes pain…. and through all the pain she still has to come she says its worth it.
I pity the next fool to say she may have done this on a whim.